Ok, ok, I know this subject gets talked about a great deal, and everybody thinks they have the key to what it’s all about!
But just hold on!
I really think I have the key to what it’s all about!
The dictionary gives a number of definitions for what confidence is, but they all boil down to one basic thing.
“…from Latin confīdere, from fīdere to trust”
If we feel we can confide in someone, we have “confidence” that they will keep what we say “confidential.”
In other words, we trust them!
If we have confidence that something will work out the way we want it to, or at least the way we believe it will, we can say we trust the process.
If we have confidence in a co-worker’s abilities, we can say we trust them to do what they say they can do, or what we have previously observed them being able to do. We trust in their ability to succeed!
Self confidence comes from a high level of trust in ourselves, not so much that what we do in any particular situation will work out, but rather that we can be ok regardless of what happens. We have a belief that we are able to handle ourselves in a wide range of situations and can handle a wide range of possible scenarios and be fine regardless of the outcome.
We trust ourselves and our ability to be resilient, flexible, and to keep ourselves safe from whatever imagined psychic or emotional threat to our well-being might be gerbil-wheeling around in our heads.
In other words, we have a recognition that we are the keepers of our own safety, and therefore feel generally safe in the world in a variety of contexts and situations.
This applies to all points in our lives, but is particularly noticeable at points of life transitions.
Transitions tend to be unsettling because those are the times when we are moving from familiarity to the unknown.
And as we all know, the unknown can be a little scary since it is difficult to prepare for, and often catches us off-guard and may require new skills and new information to maneuver through.
There’s a quote by an unknown author that I think particularly salient to demonstrate this.
“When you come to the edge of all you know,
And are about to step off into the unknown,
Faith is knowing one of two things will happen.
Either there will be something solid to stand on,
Or you will be taught to fly.”
Confidence in yourself and your capability to handle whatever comes next allows you to journey through these transitions in a way that creates more positive anticipation of your future, rather than creating fear!
You can explore life and all the adventures you might have, rather than living cautiously and missing out!
Do you trust yourself and the people in your life?
Do you have the confidence to be open to new adventures in your life?
Let me know the ways in which having confidence in, and trusting yourself or someone/something, has opened up opportunities for you, or added to the quality of your life and the joy you’ve allowed yourself to feel in a particular instance…or in general!
I’d love to hear from you…let me know whether you agree (disagree?) that trust is indeed the key to what confidence is all about!
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